Present Joining by Andy

It’s Sunday, a completely unstructured day, no Miracle Moment. I sleep late, wake and continue to lie in bed. I recall a time during the week when I led a Mystical Mind Training session and failed to center myself in Spirit beforehand. In my perception the session didn’t go well.

So I’m lying there thinking, “When will I ever get this? Why don’t I recognize my purpose and stick to it all the time?” and other thoughts like that that keep me stuck in my wrong mind. To break that line of thought I get up, eat, shower and walk to Frances’ room. Through the door I hear her talking and so I go back to my room.

I ask the Holy Spirit for help and open the Course at random. I read the section containing “present joining is your dread.” Then I hear footsteps coming towards my room. I think, “Oh shit! I’m reading about the Truth. Please don’t disturb me!” A companion appears in my doorway, visibly distressed.

A warm “Come in” issues from my mouth. As I listen to my companion I recognize the thinking as similar to my own. I make a joke about how, on this path, we seek learning, growth and happiness—then something seems to happen and we feel like shit. We both laugh pretty hard.

Then I listen again. My companion is pissed off at a brother because of what he said. My mind goes to, “If I were the Holy Spirit, what would I say?” I follow my intuition, hearing “Bring it back to the mind. What your brother appeared to do to you was really you doing it to yourself. You blame your brother, but he is just mirroring a belief you have about yourself. You are doing this to yourself. You don’t want to look at the underlying belief so you project the cause onto him.” I suggest to my companion that something like that might be going on in the mind.

A bit to my surprise, it is well received. I’m surprised because I was just feeling so off-purpose and useless a few minutes ago. Actually, the joining felt really good. Thank you, dear companion and Holy Spirit.