My Beloved Mind by Philippe

My brothers and sisters, My beloved Mind,

I just want to share my experience of the silent retreat at La Casa De Millagros. Please forgive my poor English witch is not my mother language.

I had decided to come to this retreat with the strong desire go deeper and to take the time and the devotion that would help me to feel and hear Spirit stronger.

This retreat was the most gentle and sweet experience that I could ever dream of. Spirit had guided me in this beautiful sanctuary, cared by my beautiful mighty companions, filled with Love, Peace, Joy and beauty. I felt blessed the all time and still feel it now.

The stillness and the journaling that we were guided to spend our day with, were the most powerful tools for me. That stillness allowed me to emptied my mind of my noisy thoughts, habitual thoughts, which took a few days…

The journaling was an amazing way to slow down the thinking and to allow me to structure it. I could write down a question and very often getting a clear answer…and all in a medium that you can go back to at anytime….very useful!!!

I observed the resistances of my egoic mind…mainly judgment about me and my brothers and sisters around the silence, eye contact or not, smile or not…dwelling into avoiding specialness concept and identification, feeling very uncomfortable. I was more comfortable alone then with my mighty companion.

Then some spontaneous miracle happened!

One morning Armelle proposed a 15 minutes’ dance session in the lawn.  I needed that so bad!!! I had just ask Spirit that morning to help me to warm up my heart that was feeling very cold that day…and I was heard!! During that session I felt my heart getting fill up with Love for all my companions and the symbol of the DANCE OF LOVE resonate in my mind: we are all part of it. This DANCE is perfectly orchestrated by Spirit, we just need to desire to be reminded of it and to dance along with our wide open heart. This symbol became so powerful in my mind since. Every morning meditation I am asking Spirit to remind me this Dance of Love and the Song that goes with it.

As days of deeper stillness went by, my desire to drop my belief in separation grew stronger because I had realize that my judgements were taking their hold on the belief that I was separated from my companions. Then came to me the guidance to look at all my companions in the eyes and to repeat in my mind “My Love, My Innocence” as a mantra. That Love is our true shared Identity and that Innocence is from our Father, our true reality and leaves no room for the guilt.

I asked for a Silent one on one time, for an eye gazing session. Kirsten came to me and gave me a beautiful glimpse in the mirror of  Heaven: sweet, gentle steady and so powerful. I had been so uncomfortable with the idea of gazing in someone eyes for so long….and then that beautiful simplicity unfolded in my eyes….and in my heart. Two days later, the practice continued: Geoff was inspired to organize a FULL session of eye gazing….I was so happy and scared to be able to practice my new mantra…beautiful experience to see my Love, my Innocence, my Guide in every eyes….blessed ..It is not personal.

In the mist of all those mind / heart stretching, the main desire that I was feeding steadily, was to connect better and better with my Guide. As David and Frances announced in a session on the new shift  hat they were guided to follow. That our path is all written and Spirit is the ONLY ONE who knows exactly what works best for us and what will resonate with us. We have a very highly specific curriculum for us to follow. They reminded us to really focus on that connection because this is the only way to be guided at anytime of need, with our without your mighty companion around…

I aways believed in my Angel/ Brother of Love/ Spirit of Love/ Road Companion/ my Love….those are all the name I call him depending the need of symbolism help that day.

I knew that to connect deeply with Spirit I had to go into the Holy Instant….I understood that I had to be in the present with an empty mind, and no ego noise. I could get in the present by listening to the sounds of the sanctuary but I just could not really understand how to clear the ego out of the way. Then one afternoon, I was in very deep stillness moment asking my Guide how to hear him better…and I got this amazing clear answer:

Drop your thoughts about the past, judgements, drop your thoughts about the future, doubts, stay calm in the present and you will hear me. Then I immediately understood that the ego EXIST ONLY IN THE PAST AND THE FUTUR…it CAN NOT exist in the PRESENT and only then can we hear SPIRIT…when I say “hear”, I do not mean only as a voice, but as a thought, a knowing, a resonance, a vibration of Joy, there is no words to box/explain that connection…it can be everything that Spirit feel the way to reach us.

I also understood that the strength of my desire to connect to Spirit is the fuel of the all process. The stronger my desire, the louder / stronger the connection is…..yeahhhh!

That same night we watch a movie and Jackie brought up in beautiful clarity of  how the Holy instant had no room for the slightest judgement (past) or doubt (future)….I felt that we were /are one Mind being healed and showered with the same message constantly, nothing personal…As says David: “The Spirit is constantly saying to us:Do you you get it?…Do you get it?”

The retreat kept unfolding (movies) with the same messages: on the realization that the script of our life is already written as a dream that our mind keep dreaming again and again with different back drops; that only Spirit can guide us safely through this dream and that the strength of our desire for Him and trust in Him (and ourself ) make the all process a full blown healing experience.

The silent retreat because of the shift and the more spontaneous structure allowed more joining on an one on one base. Those few joining felt like a blessing for me…such a need to express and share…with Spirit holding our hands. Washing our mind and making it deeper each time, in a perfect choreography…

Meeting amazing mighty companions sharing the same purpose and desiring to live with Spirit in our Mind, is an inspiring experience that you want to keep in your heart. As Sonia was saying, It is a beautiful symphony of Love and each of us is a perfect note. Beautiful!

I am so grateful that Spirit guided my path to a place where I could/can dive in, to see my Love, my Innocent One…

Thank you for creating such a beautiful Love Sanctuary, beautiful gardens, to allow our Mind to get into stillness and support, to cuddle with Spirit / Father. Our Love.

My desire and my prayer for my beloved Mind, is to cling /melt with Spirit and to shine the Love within now, where ever I/we go, with no judgements, no doubts, no expectation..just Simplicity….Innocence and Joy.

Amour,
Philippe